One thought on “What is self-pity?

  1. I got a couple of responses from people, just not on the blog.

    1) A friend, Chris Gallegos, posted this response on facebook:

    “I think it may be a form of pride. On one side of pride you have abject arrogance…and on the other abject self-pity. Both put you in a vise grip of attitude that make you believe there is no alternative view point and both lead to despair. Just a thought.”

    2) My son Nathan, my daughter Bekah, and I had an interesting discussion about the question.
    – They pointed out that sorrow is for the most part an emotion (not within our control) whereas self-pity is more of a choice, a deliberate stance one takes.
    – They discussed whether self-pity is a form of anger. Nathan felt that on the “anger scale” the five things I mentioned would be arranged like this (I think):

    sorrow < ----> despair < ----> self-pity < ----> sulkiness < ----> resentment at life
    less anger < ------------------------------------------------------------------> more anger

    – Nathan also pointed out that self-pity, as self-absorbed as it can be, feels more like posturing, more stagey, than real sorrow. When you feel self-pity, it’s less a matter of feeling bad about whatever, and more a matter of feeling bad about feeling bad.

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